Interracial Dating & Natural Hair

One of the great things about being natural is it's versatility. About a week ago, I straightened my hair for an "oh so needed" trim. At the time, it didn't cross my mind that my new hair do would be met with mixed emotions. Everyone from the cashier at the grocery store to the janitor had an opinion on my new straight look. The most surprising reaction was the difference in opinion of my caucasian male friends vs. black male friends. 


Many of my black male friends erred on the side of straight. One actually said to me "The natural look was starting to grow on me but I think straight looks better." (I'm thinking--But who asked your opinion tho?) My white male friends were Pro Fro. Many of them asked "Terri--what did you do to your hair?" "The curls are more you." Surprising huh? 


All along I thought that white men preferred straight hair--well because that's what grows out of their head but to my surprise I was wrong. Even my Asian male friend said to me " Terri--I wish I could grow an afro. It looks so cool. Can I touch it?" My response--"Dave- This ain't no petting zoo."


In a Facebook post by Alex Barnett- Comedian and regular contributor to The Coil Review he described his son's (interracial baby) reaction to the fact that he got his dad's (Alex's--white hair) hair instead of his Mom's (Alex's wife--black hair) hair. 


"You ignoramus. I want an Afro like Mommy. And, it's all your fault, you dumb White guy, that I'm never gonna have one. You and your straight hair, and your melanin-free skin, and your pointy nose, and your socio-economic advantages, and your colonialism. All your fault. Now, I'm just gonna have that weird, 'what kind of hair is that?' hair! I hope you're happy. Now go make yourself useful. Go get us a taxi, 'cause God knows, cabbies won't stop for Mommy and me. Nooooo, because we're people of color. And, we might be trying to do something subversive like, oh, I don't know, get where we're going!"


*Please check out his page. He has the cutest family and funny material*


It is truly surprising to me that a lot of black men still can't get down with natural hair. I mean its the same thing that grows out of their head. If you are in an interracial relationship, what does your partner think about your hair? I'm interested to see if my hypothesis that white men are more Pro Fro than black men is true. 

RELATIONSHIPS & WORK: Ladies Know your POWER!

You are such a feminist is what my boyfriend said to me. I smiled and said I know. What really lit my fire was my experience in corporate america. It only took 72 years for women to gain the right to vote and be considered equal among men---Why do you think it took them so long? Because they knew what we were capable of----In corporate america, I noticed that women were discriminated against in terms of pay, promotion or the fact that they had to take off for a pregnancy. One guy even said to if you have a baby your career is over..and that's just the way the cookie crumbles. Be it black, white or yellow men sometimes look at women as weak or inferior beings. In some parts of the world women are not allowed to drive or pass citizenship on to their children. It is sad but true. 

RELATIONSHIPS

Who I really want to speak to are young women who remain in relationships that are beneath them. 

How to tell if a guy is a jerk:

He doesn't call when he says he will. 

He doesn't do what he says he will. 

He always cancels at the last minute because something came up. 

You have never heard his phone ring because its always on silent. 

He says you're in a relationship but his Facebook says he is "single"....He says he just hasn't gotten around to changing it but he updates his status daily...

Need I say more? You get the drift. A woman's intuition is never wrong (Disclaimer: that is if you are a rational woman.) If you think he is less than faithful he probably is.  And if you think you deserve more you definitely do. 

WORK

Statistics show that women make 25% less than men for the same job and are less likely to negotiate salary. I know it's a Boy's Club and men tend to network more than we do. They play golf with the head of the department and go out drinking until 5 am and are back to work the next day as sober as a preacher on Sunday morning. Yes, genetically we are built differently but I like to think we are built better. Could you imagine how lonely and confused Adam would have been if Eve wasn't created? Thank goodness Eve gave him the apple because if he were left alone with the serpent who knows what would have happened to mankind (this is just a joke). You know you are smarter than that dumb jock who just passed you over for a promotion. So why sit back and let men have all the fun and make all the money. Get in the game and know that they are your competition and you can do it better than them because you can do it in a skirt with 4 inch heels. 

Women we need to take back our power. No longer should we allow men to treat us less than our worth.  Or step on us for a promotion that we know we should have gotten. 

FACTS

You are WOMAN.

Beautiful and Strong.

Strong enough to bear children and get back to business. (Beyonce)

Strong enough to raise great outstanding children on your own. 

For centuries men have raised wars over you. (Summer's Eve)

You are the center of Civilization.

You are the Most Powerful being on EARTH!

You are WOMAN. 

So when you're feeling a little down or less than who you know you are. Take a look and listen carefully to the words of Beyonce's song "Run the World (GIRLS)" and the Summer's Eve commercial "Hail to the V". 

Run the World (Girls)- Beyonce

Summer's Eve Hail to the V

This post is not about male bashing it is about uplifting women who men have put down.

30 Black women bloggers you should know

I recently came across an article on ForHarriet.com featuring inspirational female black bloggers. The list  includes blogs from relationships to entrepreneurship. It is definitely a MUST SEE. 

My girl Kurly Bella made the cut!

CONGRATULATIONS to all the ladies that were featured! 

Article Link: 30 black women bloggers you should know